Week 7 - Appearance
The emphasis of appearance is one of the most highly prized qualities of a human.
Appearance is a trillion dollar industry.
AND, even the industries that are NOT directly related to your physical appearance, still market their product or service in a way that ultimately speaks to the EGO.
Anti-aging, weight-loss, bikini body, and sex are a few of the avenues advertising speaks to the ego.
Although, intrinsically, there isn't anything outright unhealthy or "wrong" with any of these hooks in and of themselves, the way that they are glorified, hyper focused and obsessed about ARE unhealthy.
And for some people the quest for vanity may be that it is to be attained at any expense...
Vanity “marketing” can speak to the most unconscious parts of someone’s psyche.
BUT being that you have already done the deep dive in the weeks previous, you can see through it. And choose products or experiences that align with what you want to explore that Align with your values. And you know that these products/experiences won’t enhance your self worth. Only YOU can do that.
And if we can engage with our “appearance” as a way of exploring aspects of ourselves ….we can ignite the creativity and desire to explore new ideas.
And whether someone chooses botox, nip and tuck, or breast implants isn’t as much a concern as the WHY they are doing it. If one is coming from a place of confidence, full-ness … I don’t NEED to do this to complete me or to be accepted or FEEL sexy. If coming from a place of wholeness….then it’s possible that there may be alignment with what one genuinely wants to explore. I personally have a high value of health therefor my choices are going to align with that which adds to my overall health and longevity. I will include the long term effects of what I’m investing in for the long haul in my decision process.
Plus we need to consider that we have our own lens and perspective that we will view others choices, and of course visa versa. Sometimes we may see through the masks of others and filter how we perceive others through our own values.
So how you decide to express yourself may be misaligned with another’s. We may get triggered. For example we may experience transference (when the mannerism, behaviour or appearance triggers us based on a negative experience with someone who had similar qualities.)
OR on the other end of the spectrum we may get inspired by another’s ability to align their appearance with their personality, or to explore and express aspects of their personality and use that as fuel to get out of our comfort zone and try something new!
There are many ways that we can impact our appearance, from very subtle to total makeovers.
Some areas to explore are:
· Hygiene – cleanliness, aware of body odor,(not masked with perfume!) dental hygiene.
· Hair and Makeup – styles that are your signature or can reflect the many aspects of who you are. Easy wash and wear, or simple touches that highlight your features, or distract from areas that perhaps you don’t want showcased. Some may choose stark and dramatic hair and makeup – or whimsical flowing hair and a touch of bronzer or lipstick.
· Clothing – personal style – you may have more than one. I have styles for aspects of Katharina’s personality as previously mentioned. Accessorize – jewellery, belts, purses, signature piece
· Posture – how to you stand, sit, walk. What is your posture in conversation, when out and about.
· Body language – inviting or leave me alone. Taking things personally –changes your posture – closed protective
· Facial expression –eye contact, animated, responsive
· The masks we wear – to gain acceptance, to hide (why hide from those who can see you and why hide from those who can’t) The reasons why we wear masks varies. I know for some the answer is pride. We want others to see how greatness, and by wearing a mask we can look even better.
Just look at how healthy I am!
How spiritual.
How successful.
How disciplined.
For others masks can be used for the complete opposite reason: to hide insecurities, to cover up past mistakes, or because we feel so imperfect.
So let’s explore:
Do you slouch?
Do you hide behind your clothes?
Do you have good hygiene?
AND Yes, this CAN say a lot about your state of mind and how you perceive yourself!
Your appearance says a lot about how you feel about your body –– your physical appearance is your first impression.
When you feel good about yourself, it's amazing how you APPEAR to others.
When others comment on your appearance (hair, clothes, style) it boosts your confidence.
AND when you feel confident... you feel SEXY!!
Being aware of how we present ourselves and how others perceive us can give us a roadmap to what areas of appearance are natural to us and which areas we could explore to enhance our feeling of Confidence (or sexy)
It may be your laugh or your smile. You may have long legs, broad shoulders, or beautiful hands. How do you show them off?
Below I have a list of questions that you can use to explore your Appearance.
My invitation is to get curious.
Explore your resistance.
Get creative
And have some fun!
Here are some questions to ask yourself:
1. What does my personal style say about me?
2. What message is my image communicating about me?
3. Am I being perceived accurately?
4. What masks do I wear and why?
5. What is a common posture when I stand, sit, walk, engage in conversation (seated and standing)
6. Do I have several expressions of myself? What are they and how do I celebrate them. (ie: I have Glamorous Katharina, Hippy Katharina, Natural Katharina)
Ponderings:
Take a few minutes and write down the following items:
· Taste: What are you drawn to in clothes? (Solids, patterns, mixing prints/patterns, textures, silhouettes) And the flipside, what would you never, ever wear?
· Lifestyle: What does your lifestyle look like?
· Interests/Hobbies: What activities do you enjoy outside of work?
· Goals: What goals do you have for your life (personal and professional)?
Take a trip to your closet and review what you wrote and see if you see a pattern. Are they in alignment? If not, write down the additions or changes you need to make to your wardrobe (clothes, accessories, jewellery) . This will be helpful when you head out shopping.
Here are some links if you are interested in exploring your style.
https://anuschkarees.com/blog/2013/11/22/signature-looks-the-complete-guide-part-i/
https://anuschkarees.com/blog/2013/11/24/developing-a-signature-look-the-complete-guide-part-ii
https://anuschkarees.com/blog/2013/08/25/proportions-catalogue/
https://www.pinterest.ca/anuschka_c/_saved/
https://anuschkarees.com/blog/2013/10/06/colour-analysis-part-iii-how-to-use-your-colours/
https://anuschkarees.com/blog/2013/05/23/developing-a-colour-palette-for-your-wardrobe/
Sexy is the outward expression of self love.
Erase the line that says: Others see me as weak and broken.